fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
