Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize