im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
