Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
