): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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