this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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