Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
