I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize