yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
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