I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
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For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
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