Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
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you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
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That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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