3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
