D3 body, D1 cock
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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