There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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