Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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