i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
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This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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