can we get nightvision for the apartment?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
