I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
be right there i have to get my cape
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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