Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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