sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I have tasted many bathrooms
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
