So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
