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I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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