I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
