Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize