Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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