The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize