I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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