Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
