Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize