I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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