If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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