She's JV to your varsity
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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