Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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