quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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