Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
