I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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