I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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