So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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