So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
