she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
The ass gains better be worth it
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