Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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