He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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