I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
