bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
