four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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