I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize