it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
