there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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