watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
