I feel like I'm in dance class right now
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Randomize
